You have a lot of fun wordplay in this piece, I just feel like it's lacking some focus overall. It wants to do a lot of things, so it would be great with some more structure.

I think playing around with the title so it's expressing one clear concept would help.

Just brainstorming here:

"Tiny boxes and the men who live in them"

"Big man build tiny box"

Or maybe it's a how-to-guide to being a real man and building this impenetrable fort against the dangers in the world that can challenge your masculinity. In the trenches sort of vibe.